the secret to living with a roommate
This week has been nonstop movement. I got to Richmond on Sunday after a grueling 11+ hour car ride and haven’t stopped unpacking/moving in since. On top of that, I have been in an orientation since Tuesday night for student government. It’s all in good fun, but I’ve been EXHAUSTED. Not to mention this is the first day I’ve had to myself and I spent it grocery shopping and unpacking… did I say that school also starts in a day?!
I figured with everyone going back to or just beginning college, I thought I’d share the key to living with a roommate.
Me and my roommate have discovered the secret to living well together.
We have literally never had an argument and still like each other a year later. This approach works with virtually anyone… except people who are on the extreme side of any annoying trait… this approach works with normal people*.
When Hanna and I first decided to be roommates (all through FB messenger I might add) we made one thing clear: we are roommates first, everything else second. This is the key. But what does that mean exactly?
A lot of people go into rooming together as a chance to see a best friend 24/7. That is legitimately the worst approach. On the rarest of occasions does that ever work out… trust me I’ve heard horror stories. Why? You have to be on all the time, it’s hard to find time to yourself when you live in a small space with someone you see as your best friend. If you never establish living together as roommates first, all of the over-politeness just kind of doesn’t exist with someone you’re so comfortable with.
What I attribute to Hanna and I working together so well is this first phase of living together. We established rules and courtesies before just jumping in and not thinking about it. Then we were able to live together super well with no issues but also enjoy each other’s company. Now she’s one of my closest friends but I doubt it would be that way if we put pressure on each other in the beginning to be super close.
Mutual respect is the foundation of our relationship which makes us work so well as roommates. If we have an issue with how one of us is taking care of our mutual space, we don’t bullshit or sugarcoat things. We both live separate lives because we are pretty different. Yet, we still have so much fun together and I can tell her anything.
I really think this is the key to a good roommate situation. It all starts with the beginning. Set boundaries and respect, don’t expect to be be best friends, and be honest. Chances are if you follow this method, you won’t end up hating each other.