Today was a good day. No, it was a great day. It's funny how, when you're Type A like me, you can plan every single day to the hour and then something totally unexpected happens that just makes it incredible.
I'm back home in Boston for the weekend and I was running some errands this morning after waking up early. I was driving back home when I realized I was close to my godmother and godfather's house. So, I decided to give my godmother, Ellen, a call and see if I could come over. I was about 5 minutes from her house and she was quite surprised that it was me on the other end of the phone; but, like the sweet human that she is, she told me that I was more than welcome to come stop by and chat.
Now, I never really had grandparents. My dad's parents died almost two decades ago, and my mom's parents lived in Pittsburgh, PA until they both passed away when I was still young. The rest of my family is pretty spread out, and most of them are significantly older than me. But my godparents (despite me not being religious at all, so disregard the "god" part) have always lived about 10 minutes away from me and are the kindest people I know. They've been everything that grandparents could have been and more.
I have always been so busy; whether it was with extracurriculars or when I moved away to Richmond, VA... I don't see or talk to them nearly as much as I would like to.
When I stopped by their house today, I was there from 10:30 AM until 6:00 PM. That's nearly eight hours, if you were wondering.
I was only planning on stopping by on my way home from doing some errands. I have midterms coming up so my entire day was planned out so that I could study my ass off. Yet, when I got there and began catching up with them, I didn't care about whatever I had planned. I would make time to study or do the numerous other things I wanted to do later. As each hour went by I figured out more and more what was most important to me.
I think I looked at my phone about three times during the eight hours that I was there. And not only was I so happily invested in talking to my godparents, but I also got to meet my new cousin and their grandson. Their son, Brendan (who I used to torture when I was little, but don't worry because we are on good terms now), and his wife Jess (who is literally one of my favorite people) came over and brought their newborn son, Keegan.
All five of us, well six if you count Keegan but he didn't talk much, sat at the dining table and talked for hours about practically everything. After they left, I kept talking to my godparents for another two hours and the whole day was maybe one of the best days I have had in a while.
Some days I can't escape feeling very lonely. I know this isn't logical because I can create a rather long list of people in my life that love me unconditionally and I am unbelievably grateful for. But, nevertheless, I have those days where I convince myself I have no one. This is a symptom of depression, and even when you tell yourself it's not true, your brain is telling you something completely different.
But, then I have days like these. Days when I get to meet the most precious baby there ever was. Days when I get make snide
comments to my cousin but then also talk about how much fun we used to have together. Days when I get to ask my cousin's wife about being a mom and make plans to get dinner.
Days when I get to vent about everything that's been going on in my life for the past six months to my godparents and they somehow manage to make me feel like I can take on the world.
These might seem like little, insignificant moments to some people, but to someone who struggles to remember how lucky she is most of the time... these are the moments that keep me going.
A lot of the time it feels impossible to get out of my own head. I often have a hard time even focusing on conversations because of the speed at which my thoughts are zipping around in my brain. But today, as each hour passed, I was reminded of how grateful I was for the wonderful people I got the chance to spend time with.
Not only was it a blast, but it also allowed me to take a step back and remember what really makes me happy...
Making every interaction a meaningful one.
So, yeah... it was a pretty good day.
۞ ally ۞