Recently I've been obsessed with thinking about my life after college. I've gotten really interested in the thought of moving to a big city and starting my adult life. I picture myself going off to either Chicago or Seattle. I know I'll most likely return to Boston but I don't think I'll do that for at least a decade.
But I find myself constantly thinking of how the future will be or how the past was; it's so hard for me to just be satisfied with what is. Here's what I like to do when I find myself unable to appreciate my life as it is right now.
My favorite thing to do, something I've done for a long time, is going to some relatively isolated place surrounded by nature. The one necessity of this is that it has to have a good view. I go by myself, look at the view, and it makes me appreciate my life.
There's something about looking at a sky full of stars, or a city skyline, or a body of water that makes me feel so small. A lot of times you don't want to feel small but this is my one exception.
It's kind of like this: I had a friend once who told me to look at the train passing us. I went to see him when I was feeling very very lost. He said to imagine every person riding on that train. Each person has their own struggles, their own issues, their own situations that are constantly weighing them down. Yet they get up every single day and they live. Every single person on that train has problems.
It's not that you're supposed to feel inconsiderate or negative, but rather you should feel a sense of comfort. A kind of, "if they can do it so can I" mentality. That's the same thing I feel when I look at a good view. I imagine all of the people in this world, the ones who are still here and the ones who have already been through it, and I feel like someone is wrapping their arms around me and telling me, "you can do this, too." I look beyond myself and have such an appreciation for my position in this world at this moment in this time.
I went to the James River with a couple of friends for the first time yesterday. It was 81 degrees in the middle of February so I felt the need to do something outside. We just sat on a rock in the middle of the river and soaked in the rare winter warmth. I had one of these moments then. And, I suddenly felt very happy to be exactly where I was.
۞ ally ۞